gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Randomize
