Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
there is puke in my bra ... again
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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