i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
