you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize