she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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