I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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