how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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