I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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