glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
