There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize