Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
