i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
