I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
What a fucking waste of an outfit
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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