plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
