He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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