I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
