Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
