I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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