My cat gives me a boner
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
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