i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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