Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
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