so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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