am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
