Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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