Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
