I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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