guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Randomize
