I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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