That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
