areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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