I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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