super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize