Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize