Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
