whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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