You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
