she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
She told me I should be a condom model.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
