tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
