All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Screwed.edu
How's work?
Spinning.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
