when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
