Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You dont lie about slip and slides
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize
