Joe is yelling at the trees again.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
