I can text with my tongue
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
