Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
