It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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