I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
