just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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