physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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