how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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