I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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